February 28, 2009 at 5:31 pm (life)
I’m taking a break from my knitting today so I can clean my house. I don’t clean often (altho I DO try to keep rotting food and animal feces to a minimum), except when visitors are expected. Note here that if you ever decide to surprise me, heads up on this end would be better for you!! I don’t really mind cleaning–I just need an excuse. Then I will tear myself away from my current project(s).
My two daughters and their kids will be here for a few days of laughter, music, chess, eating and hiking (if weather permits). Frannie has a new (pink electric) guitar, Madeline has an accordian (let’s play some Wierd Al!!), and I’m picking up an old bass of J’s. Jack is bringing his new djimbae (a floor drum I probably misspelled), and we are going to Jam! Hannah began playing guitar last year and is kicking total butt on it! Plus, everybody sings–I’m loving THAT!
I was originally going to blog about methane, but decided that bitching about something I don’t like can be completely consumed by energy given to what I love. ‘Nuf said.
Being present with all my blessings. Get it?
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February 12, 2009 at 4:07 pm (life)
Wind is my least favorite condition on the mountain. It’s the hardest thing to relax when wind is whipping through the trees and eaves, making structures moan and groan. Perfect time to remind myself that being anxious or worried about possible scenarios never helps. Whatever happens, we go on from there. I’m positive that if the roof blew off, we would figure out what to do next, and then do that. Also, I’m not afraid of death and that would be the worst case. Relaxing is still hard.
Last night there were wind gusts 1mph short of hurricane level winds (75mph). The house held, and only a few branches fell close by, even the barn is still standing. The other two cabins appear to be unhurt as well. We not only have no discernible damage, but we never lost power (and we are prepared to be without power!), the phone lines are intact, even!
While all local schools are closed because of power outages, and a gym roof in Charleston caved and hurt some people, we are on a mountaintop (a seemingly vulnerable position) safe as ever.
The one casualty is a large dead oak tree we’ve been expecting to fall for 5 years. It came down across the driveway, obstructing our passage but did not land on cabin, truck, or back hoe nearby. How blessed are we? Now John gets to cut wood all day instead of mudding drywall, and I believe wood would be his preference.
Our life here on mud mountain is completely blessed!!
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February 5, 2009 at 1:29 pm (family, life)
I suck at this. Don’t know exactly why (because I believe I do?), blame the wood (it’s not dry enough, I can’t reach the good stuff on the back pile, etc), I’ll be much warmer when J gets back. For the third day I got up in 52 degrees. I probably shouldn’t complain, since it’s 2 below zero outside (and we can always put more clothes on, I say), but I totally got up twice to stoke the damn thing, and it just won’t go for me!! John will be home tomorrow night but by then it’s supposed to get up to 40.
He has enjoyed his visit for the most part–good to be with family–we are all going to get there this summer for a Buss reunion and we are looking forward to that. The doctors are saying that J’s mom could go any minute, or hang on for months. His last three visits ended with her telling him to “go away”. He left here a week ago, and left there this morning. He will be glad to get home, and I will be glad to have a warmer house!!
It’s still snowing heavily and the local schools are closed…I’m working on this effing fire!!
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February 1, 2009 at 2:23 pm (family, life)
J has gone to be by his mothers side for a few days, so Rose and I are holding down the fort. I fully understand how much work John does here, and always appreciate it. More, now, though, as I spin/knit in between almost constant maintenance: carrying in wood and keeping the fire going, attending the water systems (filter and humidification), feeding and watering the animals, driving Rose to work and picking her up, and etc. None of these things are at all unpleasant and I am enjoying this opportunity, but the status quo is definitely upended right now.
The purpose for this is more important. J’s mom seems to be coming into the home stretch, (see Benni for details about mom) and the family is gathering to say good-bye.
The bittersweet aura of an expected death is a difficult thing to respond gracefully to, and it puts me in a vulnerable frame of mind concerning my own parents. When I think about losing any of them, it’s hard to breathe, the one thing that gets us through everything.
So this morning, I’m sending blessings and good wishes (prayers) out to all grieving souls, that we might all access the power to breathe the breath of Love and Light. The illusion of separateness is transcended when a body dies. We don’t lose them, they become one with us for real. It is only the ego that experiences loss. Our spirits are inexorably connected and can only be experienced thusly when one of us dies. Much like a drop of rainwater landing in the ocean, the dying soul (drop of God) enters eternal and unconditional (cosmic ocean of) Love.
Be at peace.
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