Paradise Perspective

…begins with a single step”, I think, as another inch of spun bamboo slips into the orifice of the wheel. Being of the West (ern paradigm where everything is measured and calculated), I timed the spinning of 3 grams to 14 minutes. I have over 400 grams to go. So this is going to take a while, and for sure it won’t be the only thing I work on. Having finished one large (baby blanket) project and several small ones (a hat, two pairs of socks), I am in the space between. For maximum comfort and productivity, I will have to start no less than 4 (and as many as 7) projects by the weekend. I’ve got a music thing (recording parts for the family reunion chorus) going, so that makes 2.

New Subject

While J and I were hiking on the ridge yesterday, we discovered Morel mushrooms up there (shhhh…..don’t tell anyone local–they guard known morel locations with their lives, and are always on the lookout for more). I haven’t even seen any since the late ’70s when I lived in Iowa. I heard they were here, too, but never saw any ’til now!! They are delicious for two weeks a year. We (J) took some pictures of them (and also a May Apple–especially prolific this season), and will wait for a few more to manifest before harvesting them for dinner. A few heavenly bites.

New Suject

A close personal friend with marital problems has been consuming me for a couple of weeks. I know she understands that her situation beats the hell out of most people’s. And I believe she will come to her senses before she completely jeopardizes the balance of the precious lives of those she loves the most. But I can’t help projecting about various scenarios that could conceivably result from certain choices at this juncture. If she were to split with her old man, will I then be required to choose which of them to include in my plans? Hmmm. How many others touched by this would face similar decisions? I remember when my first husband left me, I felt like my whole circle of friends left, too. They were still my friends, of course, but they felt torn, and since they had known him first they felt their loyalties lay there.

I can’t say for certain what it is that anybody needs. But I DO know this: Happiness is NOT the result of circumstances. It is the exact opposite. Happy circumstances are the result of the decision to BE happy. Looking outside of yourself for gratification and fulfillment will only perpetuate the necessity for you to do that. Finding that you are already complete will enable you to choose happiness in any scenario without the need for any permanent damage to the current participants.

Girl, I love you dearly, but get your head out of your butt because your choice now will affect many peoples’ choices in the future.

Benni has tagged me–she was the only one I tagged the first time, and now we’re going backwards, so I can tag Madeline (academom) , Joan (nosparetime), and Heather (runningburro)!!

Five things in each of the following categories:

10 years ago, I was:

1. Living in Chesapeake, Va 2. Making EarthChairs 3. Singing with Sweet Adelines 4. Singing in Quartet du Jour 5. Taking care of my 2-year-old Hannah!!

Today’s to do list:

1. Spin wool 2. Ply wool 3. Knit wool 4. Card some alpaca 5. Spin alpaca

Snacks I enjoy:

1. m&ms 2. Mint Milanos 3. Chex mix (home made only) 4. Apples and cheese 5. Herbal tea

If I was a billionaire, I would:

1. Set up legacy accounts at my favorite charities. 2. Pay off all debt for myself and all family members. 3. Make sure they all have houses and cars. 4. Make my place on the mountain bigger and more functional (go solar). 5. Travel

My bad habits:

1. I’m obsessed with all things fiber (bad from some perspectives, good from others) 2. Must talk philosophy at least once a day. 3. Sitting (to spin, knit, play computer games, etc.) 4. Skipping breakfast. 5. Still haven’t mastered patience where it’s most important.

Pet peeves:

1. bad grammar, spelling and usage. 2. Negative judgments. 3. Defensiveness 4. Noise 5. That all the things that annoy me, I am usually guilty of.

Places I’ve lived:

1. Webster County WV 2. Chesapeake, Va 3. Ceiba, Puerto Rico 4. Waukegan, Ill 5. Lincoln Ne. (those are just the LAST five!)

Jobs I’ve had:

1. Dilly Bar maker 2. Cottage parent for 17 HS girls 3. Chicago cab driver 4. Dressmaker 5. Business owner.

The peacock feather shawl (the second one I’ve made) is coming along.  I’m in a very confusing part of the pattern where I can’t have a conversation or watch TV or I’ll lose my place.  So the relationship with the process is much more intimate than usual.  I noticed this morning how beautifully I have spun the yarn, and how great it’s turning into the lace.  Also, pictures of other things to make come into mind (as opposed to the images of Ugly Betty and her entourage).

I’m coming back to the mindful knitting thing and paying more attention to what it is I’m thinking.  Truely, what you give energy to (the object of your attention) becomes manifest.  The projects on deck are numerous and more personally creative than they have been in the past.  And although it wasn’t my particular intention to make up designs, I have somehow attracted new ones because of my attention to creating.

I expand yet further.

Aside from a particular product I invented and marketed a few years back (EarthChair), I don’t, as a rule, sell my stuff.  But there is a cool venue here in WVa that showcases WVa artisans exclusively.  A friend of mine sells hats that she makes there, and has encouraged me to put a package together and get juried (their screening process).  So I am in the process of doing that.  With the family saturated (overflowing with wool garments), it might be time.  I do have some unique accessories that might actually interest a passerby or two.  The cool thing about this particular establishment is that they don’t consign.  They buy the stuff (like a department store), so you don’t have to wait until something sells for payment.

It’s so interesting to see how as my thought process changes, the circumstances in my life follow suit.  I believe this is going to be a very positive thing.  Plus, I’m really enjoying myself!  You do the same.

I’ve been so profoundly embroiled in the common accepted perception of this material reality that trying to monitor my thoughts and feelings has proven to be an unbelievably difficult undertaking.  While in a meditative (or, more accurately, pensive) state, I can easily see the ways in which I respond and react to my circumstances, and how I (and those around me) could benefit from positive change.  However, while in the midst of an unplanned situation my ego doesn’t want to THINK about anything.  I already know which cuss (and volume with which to deliver that cuss) feels right and will enhance my participation.  Energy, attention, vigilance and mindfulness are required.  Some days I can feel myself relaxing into what it is.  Others, autopilot just kicks in and I won’t be different.  I am aware of the difference, tho.  One step forward, two steps back.

 

The other day, I ran 1.1 mile(s), and walked another .2.  I couldn’t believe how proud I was even while wondering if my lower calves will ever stop screaming.  Then yesterday I ran only just a mile.  I’m feeling discouraged on several levels, here.  One step forward, two steps back.

 The project I’m working on right now is an amazing peacock feather pattern lace shawl. I’m using some mossy green American Cormo (wool breed that is extremely cottony) that I spun really fine and plied 2-ply.  I’m about three quarters through, and the last leg of it is soooo confusing.  If I finish this I will consider myself a master lace knitter.  I promise to learn how to post photos and post one!  Two steps forward.  Be blessed.