Paradise Perspective

In the seven years since we’ve been on this mountain, no one has lived close by.  Last summer, a young couple moved in to the house at the bottom.  I have spoken to them on several occasions and made every effort to establish a friendly rapport.  Silly me.

Yesterday J and I hiked down to our mailbox (which is right by their house), and while we were retrieving our mail, S(the guy) came by in his car and stopped.  He doesn’t want my sheep around. Since the gate which used to be on their porch has somehow been disabled, my animals go there.  I’m not so sure it happened more than once, but he was agitated and demanding that I fix it.

Granted, he is in the right, legally and ethically.  But he is so angry.

In my desire to be communicative and have peace with these people, I tried to engage in an exchange concerning possible solutions.  But because his only concern was righteous anger (finding fault, placing blame), adult communication was not an option.  John tried to coerce me off up the hill, but I got sucked in.  Even though he’s right, I wanted him to be nice about it, and because he couldn’t be, I reverted back to my old self.  I can be oh so self righteous as well.  Told him he was being a dick after he threatened to take a shit on my porch.

I finally left promising to sweep off any sheep turds I see until we can figure something else out.  This morning I put them a baby gate up where their broken one used to be.  (I’m trying to make a vague reference here to the fact that they destroyed the thing that kept the sheep off).  When we returned from S-ville, the gate was on the ground by our mailbox.  A feeble attempt at resolution, but nonetheless an attempt.

After J and I talked about it, we think that S (the guy) might just really need something to control.  Then J saw another neighbor who indicated that S wants to control everything and everybody, and is not getting along with anyone around here.

I do not want to have enemies for my nearest neighbors.  And I do not want to be consumed with anxiety over this contention (or any).  Whatever will unfold in regard to this situation, I’m trusting the universe to guide me when action is needed, and send love and blessings the rest of the time it occurs to me.

I’m so different than I used to be.

The thing that is happening now, is that instead of me being able to monitor my own thoughts before speaking energy I don’t want to speak, I’m much more inclined to notice what YOU are saying and question your intentions. “Do you really want to be putting out THAT energy?” Etc.

It has always been a sort of first step for me in any such endeavor: project my intention onto my loved ones and “guide” them toward the result that I myself am aspiring to.

However annoying it might be to them, however, it IS a way for me to become more mindful of those things my own self, and it DOES help. I am paying more attention to the things I speak, and ultimately speaking less “trash” (unproductive energy) and more desirable subject/object matter.

It’s fun.

A good breakfast, no?

Tamarack was a bust. They don’t buy your stuff if you use a published pattern. Peacock Feathers shawl was designed by Dorothy Siemens for Fiddlesticks knitting patterns–I couldn’t have designed it, but am grateful for those who DO design so I have something to do!!!

The prescreener guy loved all my hats, though, and encouraged me to take them for jury (they ARE my own designs), even though the flyer/handout thingy said they were NOT looking for hats or other knitted accessories. I really don’t want to just be making hats to sell, anyway. Plus I thought the Guitar straps (handwoven hemp) would be better received and they were summarily dismissed.

Another discouraging thing was pricing. He encouraged me to charge what I think I’m worth (one of my favorite things to think about), but reiterated often that the mark-up is 100%. So what I charge, they double it to resell.

I’m not disappointed, however. I went there to find out the procedures and logistics of selling to (at) Tamarack, and we found out. John thinks we can do better on our own–either a website or ebay. Or both.

I really don’t need the income, but was hoping to help with student loan pay-back. Not giving up.

So, I haven’t touched my knitting, read my daily lesson or done my yoga.  This might be bad.  J assures me that the novelty will wear off.  Good.

This morning I searched for lyrics, found a couple new blogs and information sites, and read, read, read.  It’s overwhelming how much there is, so I’m breathing myself through the initial onslaught, and believing that I will settle into a manageable routine soon. 

In any discussion concerning the concept that everything is created according to the law of attraction, has validity in its existence and serves a positive purpose in the long run, there is always a reference to the horrific. People do not want to let go of the idea that it is possible to be a victim. We stubbornly hold on to our belief in other’s power over us, and our own powerlessness against sickness, poverty, and persecution.

In our creation of our own reality, it is necessary for us to completely understand and become intimate with contrast. In order to “turn the other cheek” and look toward that which is desirable, we must, in many cases, first face that which is NOT.

Whether something is evil or not is established by our own judgment. Anything we do not agree with, believe in, or want to experience could be defined as evil. This is painfully apparent in the structure of our legal system. Looking at the many laws that are directed toward specific behaviors in specific situations indicates our general aversion to taking responsibility for our own actions. That we are free to sue anyone for anything, and that the manipulation of the “letter of the law” by ingenious and deceitful lawyers for the sake of winning cases for profit dictates that the actual result is far removed from the original intent of any law.

Aside from all of this insanity, I believe we are in any situation because we want to be for the purpose of learning what to create next. And the farther afield we go in one direction for our experience, the further it is possible to go in the other.

In the Course in Miracles we are encouraged to understand that nothing really has any meaning until we assign it. Here in this physical realm, by having to measure everything against everything else, we have decided that one end of the spectrum must be bad if the other is good. But when creation was finished, “God said, it is good”. God didn’t say it’s only half good, or it’s mostly good except for this and this and this (Charles Manson, for example).

If God can look at creation and see it as all good, then our perception of creation is different from God’s. In our never ending quest to find a steadfast truth and stick to it, this particular difference might be significant.

I’ve always said I would never run.  It hurts in so many places and in so many ways, I just never understood it other than running was for other people what drinking or smoking used to be for me.  Just another addiction or preferred vice.  I’m smoke-free and sober 18 years, now.  Have walked and hiked avidly the whole time.

While in Syracuse last month, I went with the kids to an annual Park District activity which included runs, a 1 mile, and a 5K.  A couple of the kids who were registered for the 1 mile wimped out at the last minute, so I good-naturedly decided to participate.  Finished second to last, under 15 min.  About the same velocity as I walk. It was markedly exhilarating, and didn’t hurt that much.

After I got home, I was visiting a friend and her new baby, and the subject came up.  Kathy runs when not too pregnant, or recovering from her cesarean delivery.  She says, “You have the whole summer to train for the 5K in Sept.”  Right.

Two days ago I purchased some new Nikes, and this morning I ran down the mountain and almost all the way back up.  I’m not sure how to measure the distance, since it’s a hill, I’m working harder coming up, ya know?  But I guess I need not concern myself with those kinds of details just yet.

Now for the relevance:  After watching “The Secret”, and studying “The Law of Attraction”, I started feeling and attracting to myself thinness. Duh.

 Although I am more seriously concerned with the abstract elements of my philosophies, I have become more in tune with just how my ideas and attitudes actually do manifest themselves into my physicality.  I love it!  Be blessed. 

Dr John Demartini says that “when the voice and the vision on the inside become more profound, clear and loud, then you have mastered your life.”

While perceiving the world from the commonly accepted paradigm, this statement seems self-serving and egotistical.  Yet we are told in scripture that our spiritual self is the interface with the Holy Spirit (God).  While connecting and communing with this part of me, my ego is quite unpresent.  It is my ego, however, that is unsure about any information recieved, since it needs to measure it all against what all the other egos believe.  We have so much guidance and wisdom available to us, but our egos won’t let us give any of it purchase.

I believe with absolute certainly that I have all power and knowledge at my disposal.  Jesus told us we do.  When I finally get out from under the scrutiny and controlling influence of my insidious ego,  how will I be different?  I will know I am  perfect, and not doubt.  I will also see perfection in everyone and everything else.  Paradise.  The ego is the apple.  Bless you.

Today I celebrate with my husband, John, twenty-five years of marriage. We have learned and grown so much in that time because we have been and stayed together through thick and thin. It is easy to work anything out if you focus on what you are grateful for instead of complaining about what you are not. I love you, John, thank you.

I spin wool primarily (other fibers to a lesser degree), and have recently attended the popular spinner’s and weaver’s event in Maryland. After amassing a large quantity of diverse fibers, I’ve pretty much not done anything else lately. When asked “what will you make with that?” My usual response is, “I’m not sure, it will tell me what it wants to be.” Mostly it wants to be socks, hats mittens, shawls. Mostly they become warmers to my children and grandchildren and other extended family members and friends.

This morning I was marveling at my great fortune in acquisition, spinning this dreamy merino top in a “roses and ashes” multicolor, realizing that the things I do mirror the purpose of my life. As I bring fibers together, draughting them and allowing them to slip through my fingers and wind around each other to form itself into something useful, I consider the fibers of my life; conditions, situations, relationships; how they come together under my guidance (attraction, allowance) and as they slip through my fingers with a minimum of direction (draught), are miraculously transformed into new situations, conditions and relationships (or new levels, dimensions of existing ones).

The wool fibers are transformed into garments that then hold (and warm) feet, hands, heads and shoulders of those most important to me in my life. As it is my aspiration to shine light and love as well as I can, I am inadvertantly translating those thoughts into things that hold and communicate on that deepest of levels God’s love and light.

The word effortlessly comes again to mind. I am doing always what I love to do, and now consciously integrating the very purpose of my being. What we truly desire to achieve is not some illusive occurrence in the future. It happens simultaneously with everything we do. Right now.

It has become apparent that I have attracted into my life the very literature that teaches me that we attract into our lives everything that we experience. Being embroiled in stuff New Age for the last fifteen or twenty years sometimes had me rejecting my roots in Christianity, and disregarding the Bible. At some point I began to see not only a correlation between and among new age and holy stuff, but also desired to see them emerge as sources of the same information.

They are. While reading “The Secret” and “The Law of Attraction”, even when not mentioned, I flashed on scripture that supports these concepts. Then I found a book that actually sites scripture while describing the utilization of this universal law. I desired for all this information to come together and have meaning from all perspectives and it has revealed itself to be so.

Because of our original perspective of “knowledge of good and evil”, a convoluted process of reorganizing our thought processes is necessary. But I believe that consideration of a perspective that does not concern itself with opposites like good and evil, likes and dislikes, etc, will relieve me of necessity to judge, and thearefore free me up to focus on feeling all my aspirations realized (the mountain moved), and it is so (Amen). Be blessed.

I’m going to reference some of my favorite books and authors, but understand that this is just the tip of the iceberg. A long time ago, I read a book by Henry Reed, “Mysteries of the mind” which is a study of the possibilities inherent in our phsychology of thinking. He got his base understanding from the readings of Edgar Cayce. From there I was drawn to more and more work that came out of those readings. John Van Auken has written an amazing correlation between the Book of Revelation and our creative energy processes. Mark Thurston, Harmon Bro, Robert Grant, Elsie Sechrist, Kevin Todechi and , of course, Hugh Lynn Cayce, just to name a few, have all done groundbreaking work in uncovering concepts from the readings that not only apply to our evolution of consciousness, but contribute invaluably.

Some other authors that have inspired me are the Dalai Lama, Greg Braden, Paul Ferrini, Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson, Hugh Prather (and others inspired by the Course in Miracles), Neville, Yehuda Berg (and other works on Kabbalah).

Books about Quantam Physics (for the layperson), the holographic universe, the speed of light, etc., are extremely helpful in getting a handle on a more realistic perspective. So much of what we base our view of the world on is fragmented understanding of the actual physical reality and the impact we actually have on it with our mind. Scientists have known for decades that you cannot observe anything without affecting it!!

A great one-nighter: “The Four Agreements” by Miguel Ruiz. To help understand how and why we see the way we do. Love and blessings.